I first began to question my desire have children during my late teens. Prior to that, I just assumed I would have kids because that's what I thought everyone did. Senior year of high school I had a teacher who was pregnant with her third child. She made pregnancy and childbirth sound like the ultimate miracle; honestly, she was quite smug. She actually told us that we shouldn't do drugs - especially the girls in class- because when we decide to have kids, the effects of past drug use could have negative consequences for our children. What?! She made it seem as though it was every girls' desire and duty to have healthy babies. That's what made me question the desire for kids.
Since that moment, everyone has told me that I'll change my mind. At 18, everyone said I'll feel differently by my mid 20's, or when I graduate college, or when I meet the right man. Now, I'm 25 and feel no differently than I did at 18. I have a college degree, but in no way can afford to raise a child. As for the right man, I've found him, and he hates kids. I hate that people assumed that I didn't know what I wanted because I didn't have a man in my life, as if I needed him to help me figure it out. How stupid, right? The right man for me has always been a man who doesn't want kids. I would never compromise on that, and neither should anyone else. Furthermore, I don't want to love anybody more than I love boyfriend. A child would always have to come first, and I just don't want that.
Perhaps I should start telling parents that they'll change their minds.