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The NotMom Interview: Mrs. Santa Claus, The Woman Behind the Sleigh

Childless and childfree women come in lots of shapes and sizes. We are all colors, all cultures, and all ages. As much as we have in common, we are also very different. Some people say it is strange to define ourselves by things that we are not, so let’s determine what we are instead. Childfree blogger Laura LaVoie interviews women without children who answer the question, “If you’re not a Mom, then who are you?”

December 2017 is very special: I had an opportunity to talk with the woman behind the man in the red suit, Mrs. Claus. We don’t often think about her role in the Christmas holiday, but she may be the proto-NotMom.

Mrs. Claus is married to Santa, a man beloved by children all around the world, but, she never had children of her own. It was nice to sit down and have a fantastic one-on-one conversation with the woman at the North Pole.

Tell us about yourself and your lifestyle.

Well, I live in a sprawling polar estate surrounded by elves and reindeer. My husband gets all the attention, which is fine with me. If people don’t know my first name, I can have some privacy. Some say it’s Martha, and I neither confirm nor deny it.

Up here, I’m able to spend a lot of time perfecting my hobbies. I love to cook and bake.

In the summertime, I love to garden. People don’t often think about our home in the summer, and it isn’t like we get a lot of warm weather, but that allows me to spend time doing things I love to do on my own without anyone really bothering me. Mr. Claus spends so much time each year preparing for the next Christmas that he enjoys solitude the other 11 months of the year as well.

Do you feel like you’re treated differently for not having children of your own?

You know what, no one ever really thinks about it. I mean, who talks about Santa having kids? I’ve seen some of these movies that imply that Santa and I had a family, but that’s just fantasy. I think that is people wanting to project their own life choices on to our lifestyle.

Otherwise, I don’t think people really care much whether or not we’ve had a family. I wish other women might have the same courtesy, but I know about the comments that women without children hear all year long.

How do you feel making other people’s children the focus of your life?

It has been our life mission. We absolutely love children. We didn’t have any of our own so we could focus on bringing joy to little ones all around the world.

Things get less complicated when you’re immortal, too. I mean, it has never been a concern of ours as to who will take care of us when we’re old. We’ll always be the age we are now.

Do you view the elves as employees or extended family?

Ha ha! That’s a good question. I never want anyone to think that we’re running a sweatshop up here.

The elves have dedicated their lives to our mission, too. They truly are our chosen family. We feel very rich in that respect. We are always surrounded by love and encouragement.

Do you ever go on adventures of your own?

I never want to give into typical gender stereotypes, but I’m not as interested in traveling the world like my husband. In fact, besides that one time a year, he doesn’t really travel much either.

I think you could say we’re both homebodies. But we have so much work to do getting ready for Christmas Eve each year, we never feel restless.

What would be your idea of the perfect Christmas gift?

It may sound cliché, but I think our primary wish has always been world peace. That’s why we focus so much on the children. Through them, peace is possible.

What do you want women without children to know?

I would like each of them to know that she is a whole and complete person regardless of whether or not she has children. As NotMoms, we can put our energies to any number of things that will benefit our planet and the Universe. There isn’t only one right path.

I’m grateful to have a role in making so many children truly happy. I don’t know if I could be as effective at it if I had been a mother myself.

Original Post Date: December 23, 2015

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